Saturday, February 6, 2010

Literal Technology Forum

Mr. Bedelia
Hey, look, i'm not very computer savvy and i have a REAL problem! Someone i know took this horrible (just ghastly!) picture of me that i HAVE to get rid of!! (he refuses to delete it!) Trouble is i don't have no clue how to go about it! i CAN get on this person's computer! Would that help??? Really need help bad! PLEASE, somebody, help!!!

Mr. Geek
It sounds as if you have a relationship issue (maybe a grammar one too), not a computer issue; but, still, I think we ought to be able to get you fixed up no problem. Just hang in there and do everything I tell you... exactly like I tell you.

First thing, open Windows.

Once you do that, you need to Log On.

Now, from the Desktop, open My Computer.

How do you do that? Uh, you move the mouse...

Find My Documents next.

After that, you will need to search all Folders until... find the picture.

No. No. I said Picture, not Pitcher!

Once you have found the picture, find the Delete key on the Keyboard.

Then say "yes" when asked if you want to put the photo into the Recycle Bin.

Just to be safe, empty the Recycle Bin into Cyberspace so that this photo can never be restored.

Close My Computer which will take you back to the Desktop.

Log Off and you are almost done for.

Last of all, please do not forget to Shut Down Windows.

Whew! All that... just to get rid of...


(And I do apologize for that startling ending.)


Anonymous said...

Seriously... that is the funniest thing I have read in a very long time!! very very funny!!!
(Mrs. Groff)

Isaac said...

That was a great story idea, Emma! Carmen, you did a wonderful job putting it into pictures! And Conrad, thanks for sacrificing your esteemed knowledge for the enjoyment of others. Now the reason comes out about way you wanted a mouse, and the taking of the facebook poll. ;)
I very much enjoyed the "Literal Technology Forum" post and I'm looking forward to future stories.

BTW, Conrad, I don't think any less of you. ;)

Scott Eash said...

Quite a clever post, Carmen (and Emma)! I know some people who would get a kick out of this - oops, maybe I shouldn't put it that way. :-)

Conrad, I'd hate to see what would happen if your Windows crashed...

~Rebecca~ said...

This post is pure genius!!! I love the "Amelia Bedelia" book series!! please do more of these!

We always wonder how Amelia would pick up her room...


Sylvia said...

Very well done, Carmen and Conrad. Truly a memorable post!!! :)

Carmen M. said...

Thanks all. I hope none of you literally got a kick out of this. I'd rather not get sued for causing my readers internal injuries. But if you did, they say laughter is the best medicine. ;-)

Rebecca and Scott, thanks for the ideas, no matter how impractical. :) I will now be on the lookout for a broken window and... well... a room that could be picked up I guess. :-)